guys don't understand us. we don't even understand us. believe me; if we could make our way of thinking change, we would. we want to be simple. we want those wheels in our brain to stop turning at times. it's just not the way the cookie crumbles. it was difficult keeping it to 10; there are just so many things you men should know without us sounding like 'single white female', but let's give it a try:
10) we ask questions. lots of them. so just humor us and answer them. we like details - we don't want one word answers. here's a tip: maybe give more details the first time around and we won't have to follow up with 12 more questions.
9) we rarely mean what we say. if we say we're "fine", that means we're not and you better care enough to pry and find out what's wrong. if we say "whatever", we're not satisfied with whatever you just said to us. be prepared for it to sneak back up on you later like a missile in the ocean. and the big one: if we ask "who was there last night?" (wherever you decided to go without us), we really want to know if any ex or ex-hook up was there, what she said to you, did you have more than a 2 minute conversation with her and if so, what did you talk about? we don't care about any old high school buddy you saw there. period.
8) most girls never want a one night stand. while the idea of a one night stand might seem appealing, fun and easy - it's just not how most of our brains work. we immediately go into 'future' mode. could he be a potential boyfriend? would my friends and family like him? does he have a decent job, a 5 year plan and a savings account? crazy, we know. BUT IF IT DOES HAPPEN - please know that we do not like staying the next day either. it's awkward for us, too. we (most of us) know that we should not linger. believe me, we don't want you seeing our day-after-makeup-hungover-face.
7) we DO believe in soulmates. sorry. we know you're out there.
6) we remember everything you say. everything. and more than likely we'll spend hours trying to dissect the statement. we ask our friends, mom and anyone else
5)we fight smart. for the most part, most of us know how to pick our battles. we may not like it. sometimes we may not be able to hold back. but if you get us to that certain point of crazy, we have a whole bag of one liners that we'll whip out when in need. you know what lines I'm talking about; ones that seem so simple and unworthy of your reaction at the moment- but hours later, you can't believe we actually said that. yes sir, we know what we're doing.
4)we're basically private investigators. i'm unsure as to why the entire FBI isn't 100% female. we find everything out. it may not be right away; when we know you're lying, and believe me we do, we will dig and dig until the truth comes out. we have ways (that will not be listed in this post). never underestimate a girl who's on the hunt. and angry - very very angry.
3)we're fixers. a lot of us think we can fix you and your 'problems', whatever they may be. it's a bad habit of ours. we have our own issues (clearly), so why take on more? that's what we do. try to gently tell us that we should accept you for who you are. most of us will take it well.
2)a bad dream will ruin your day. every once in a while we might have a terrible dream; you cheated, you talked to a girl we hate, etc. trust me when i say: that you were lucky we didn't push you off of the bed as soon as we woke up. we will be pissed at you for the rest of the day for something you "did". if not the day, at least the better half of the morning. just let us cool off - we can't believe you did what you "did".
1)in some ways, we can be simple. i know - how could i have just said that after #10-2? we really just want your love and attention. the small things really do wonders for you. a random card, maybe a surprise coffee dropped off at work, remembering something we said a week ago and surprising us with it. we just want to know that you're thinking about us. we know it's not all of the time, we don't expect that. we want space, too. we can't deal with you 24/7 either. but come on, you know it's the little simple things that get us. so do them.
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